I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
