My sheets look like a crime scene.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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