In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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