the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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