I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
are you so shy because you have an std?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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