Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize