5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
