So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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