It's like God shit irony all over that family
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
