Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize