in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Pants are for mortals
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
