Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize