your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
