Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
It's never too late to be topless.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
