we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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