Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Randomize