super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
