HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
