He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
