Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize