My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize