Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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