dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
