You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
