Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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