You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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