gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
