Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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