You just made me feel so damn special
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize