super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
nutella sex= disaster
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
