I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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