She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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