It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Randomize
