I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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