u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
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