I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Randomize
