yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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