When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
