I like my sex mixed with concussions.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
