And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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