You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
