You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
