whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
