that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
