I love black thongs
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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