so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
