went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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