first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
