I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
My breasts were aching with rage.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
