I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
