It's just like the Real World with babies
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
