if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I will die if light touches me.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
